Nice Lady

So, yesterday was Herceptin week. It was also my six-week catch-up with the oncologist. I signed in, I waited, I was (gah) put on the scale, and ushered back to the room for blood pressure and all that good stuff. Apparently all blood counts are normal, my resting heart rate was around 60, my temperature was normal, and my oxygenation was at 98%, and my blood pressure was 112/60. Cancer WHO?

Anyhow, in quite the expeditious manner, Dr. C pops his head in the room, shakes my hand, and asks how I am doing. "Fine, fine - I'm feeling great!" He asks me if I'm doing some hiking and I tell him yes, but nothing crazy lately - just locally. He nods and smiles and hands me the paper vest, then returns a few minutes later. He asks me a couple more random questions, and then says...

"Wow, you're not even like a patient anymore. Really, you're like this nice lady
that just happens to come visit me every few weeks..."

I laugh and tell him, "Ah, I wish that were true..."

Then off to the chemo suite. Which was weird-feeling yesterday, but I suppose I can't complain as long as it was one-stick and done.

How the hell do I deal with the juxtaposition of embracing the effect of cancer and at the same time, leaving it all behind?

Now, especially I think I need to remind myself that all things are possible because I have no idea how the hell to do that. Doesn't this crap come with a manual??