Ok, so I look a little balder in photos than I think I do...

But I tell you, up close and personal, the hair is growing. I would like, of course, for it to grow a bit faster, but all in time, I suppose. Not too bad for two weeks of growth. It's fuzzy. I've also apparently graduated from the Silvio Dante look to Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle. (Sing it now... "Life is Unfair....") Anyhow, it's growing, it's not shedding, and it's fuzzy. Enough on the hair(less)ness.

Greg wrote a great email about week 12 by the numbers. I wish I had it with me, but not having it at my fingertips, apparently I've been stuck 42 times total, with yesterday's only being 5. It was mentioned to me in passing to think about the possiblity of having a port installed, and let me tell you, I am not for it, at all. I know in the big picture it will be easier than fishing for a vein, but at this point, I'm going to fight it as long as I can. I don't want the surgeries, outpatient or not. I don't want the intrusion it may cause to my exercise regimen which is so important to me. I just don't want it. I'd rather get stuck 5 times a week, ridiculous as that sounds. Anyhow, I think I'm putting the cart before the horse at this point. I have a few more things to try before resorting to that. These veins WILL hold up. They will.

All in all, it was a pretty good day though, and marked week 12, which means halfway home. In the chemo suite they have a tradition of ringing a bell for the conclusion of a course of treatment and transition onto the next phase of a person's journey. We internally rang half a ceremonial bell yesterday. Go ahead, feel free to ring along with us.

We saw a story on The Today Show this morning about Hoda Kotb's experience with breast cancer and her decision to share it with the world. One thing that stood out so vividly to me is her saying that she spoke with a stranger on an airplane and he said to her, "Don't hog your journey."

I have to say, that's one thing I've done differently this time. I know I mentioned it in an earlier post, about being out there for someone to see that it's ok... and I know I mentioned how great I felt that Lisa told me that my experience has made her fears a little less scary, but the more time goes on, the more I realize how important whatever impact I can make really is. The Arizona Republic called yesterday and is going to run a story, as well. Seven years ago? I never would have done this. I never would have put myself out there, scars and all, for the world to see. Somehow along the way, I learned to let people in, and learned how to experience my emotions, and learned how to love and be loved, and learned how to eliminate the negative elements from my life. Recently, I also managed to find the courage to "not hog my journey" and his name is Greg. Thank you, my best friend, my "publicist", my biggest cheerleader, my constant companion, my love. Because of his encouragement fueling my courage, I hope I have helped someone out there breathe a little easier, if only for a moment. How huge is that.

3 comments:

    "Don't hog your journey".....WOW! What a great line!

    I'm glad the new you is letting us in more than the old you did......now, if only we were helping you as much as you are helping us, well, that would be wonderful!

    And you are adorable with the fuzz!!!

    I love the fuzz!! You are adorable. and I like this new you too! I can so barely remember the old one that it is nice :)

    If i rub your head will I have good luck?