PFS (puffs?)

I've been stressed about this upcoming scan. I've been bound and determined not to let it get in the way of my here and now, but beneath it all, behind the roadrunner, I've been stressed. I admit it. Until picked up the latest issue of Cure magazine the other day. As I was flipping through, I glanced at something that said "Progression-free Survival", and suddenly, it hit me. The upcoming scan is not a harbinger of possible impending doom, but a reminder that that's exactly where I am. PROGRESSION-FREE SURVIVAL. I know I won't know this for certain until the results of the scan are reported, but I'm now convinced that PFS is where I currently reside. We all know I'm not a fan of statistics, and perhaps this line of thinking is the same as Cafeteria Catholicism, but I looked at the facts that we do know. The chemo was working. Last we checked, the liver spots, save for one "cold" one, were gone. The surgery showed that all the cancer had been removed, save for the one spot on the liver that we assume is the same one as was there before. Without biopsying (is that a word?) the spot, there was no way to tell if it was active or dead, but it was the only one. However, the fluid that they removed, assuming that it was malignant ascites in conjunction with the liver metastases had NO evidence of malignant cells. Don't I sound medically knowledgeable?! Also, Herceptin is not exactly a placebo. It's a proven biologic therapy for my particular type of cancer AND, as a single agent, is indicated for treatment of HER2-over expressing breast cancer in patients who have received one or more chemotherapy regimens for metastatic disease. Uh huh, that's me. And lest I forget, as I was told months ago, "It doesn't have to hurt, to work." So there you have it. Puffs, it is!

Lately, I'm actually looking forward to this being confirmed, as there's a pretty good chance we'll be taking a couple of days off following, to celebrate our one year anniversary. A hell of a year it's been... and I can't think of anyone else in the world I would rather share the rest of the years with. (Good thing, huh?)

Meanwhile, the 2397 GMP is due this week and I have to review and modify the contract, the 2375 GMP is due next week, I should follow up on the 2379 GMP submitted last week, and who the hell knows about the status of 2388 at all. I probably should get my personal assessment completed so that I can get my review done that is now two months overdue. Somewhere along the line, my "measurable" goals turned into "stay alive and as strong as possible" over the last year.

What I do know is that I'm two for two in the major sporting event pools this year so far, thanks to the Giants and the Jayhawks. And that we ran 3 miles this morning. And that it's baseball season and we're going to the 2nd home game tonight. Perhaps this is a prophecy continued things to come...



    : )

    i like puffs. : )