Just show up.

"You know that ridiculous scan you have tomorrow?"
"Uh huh."
"Don't worry, God's got your back."
"How do you know?"
"I just do..."


Tomorrow is today, and I've done all I can do except for show up.

I still believe that when I hear the results next week, they will be just what I want them to be. I have played out the scene a hundred times in my mind. We're sitting in the room, waiting for the doctor to come in. I see him come in the door, and I can't bring myself to look at the expression on his face. In my mind, at least.

Reality? I still think this is my PFS time. Which will take me to Thanksgiving. Which will get me to Christmas. Which will bring me to the Grand Canyon and able to hike during that trip this year. Worst case scenario? I have umpteen options to get rid of whatever may be lingering, and keep living my life. Either way, we get to leave for San Diego the next day.

That right there, that's "yay" enough. I can't wait.

I know I've done all I can do, but I suppose it doesn't mean I won't keep praying. It's almost time for that shower...

3 comments:

    fingers crossed and prayers being said.

    Puffs time!!!

    On April 18, 2008 at 9:26 AM Anonymous said...

    I'm with Jill - my fingers are crossed, and prayers are being said here, too. I think of you often, and I am definitely pulling for you! Also, thank you for the birthday wishes. :) You know, I just sent my mom the link to your 3Day yesterday, and she told me last night that she stopped by. I said, "Did you mention who you were?" and she said, "I didn't know how." Heh. I know she was adamant about sponsoring you, so it doesn't surprise me that she donated. I am going to give Carolyn the link to your blog, too, because I really think she could use the information and inspiration found here. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all of the advice you're willing to share to help her get through this. You are awesome. Maybe when I'm out in your area in June (the 17th through the 24th) we can get together for lunch or something?

    On April 19, 2008 at 4:56 PM Anonymous said...

    You know that you are in my prayers all the time, don't you?

    So, when do you get the results? That is the WORST part as far as I am concerned! I want to know as soon as the machine turns off!!!!

    and of course you will still be in PFS - that is NOT up for discussion!!!


    love you!